Yes, yes, yes!

Sex during pregnancy is different for every couple. You may find that it’s the best sex you’ve ever had, or you may completely abandon the idea of sex altogether. You may find that your sex drive is at an all-time high, or you may find that the very thought of it is enough to make you head straight for the great white telephone! Whichever way your libido chooses to go during pregnancy, it’s vital to remember that your partner’s desire for sex can also be subject to change at this time. While some men feel even closer to their pregnant partner and enjoy the changes in their bodies, others may become worried about the idea of becoming a parent and, as a result, their sexual desire may decrease.

Some women also fear that intercourse during pregnancy will bring on labour, while others fear that the baby will be ‘hit’ by the penis once the head is engaged in the pelvis. Neither belief is true.

For a start, the foetus lies safely in the womb and occasional movement, contact or orgasms cannot cause it harm. During orgasm, the womb will contract more than usual, but not to the same extent as it does just before delivery. Also, your baby is fully protected by the amniotic sac (the thin-walled bag that holds the foetus and surrounding fluid) and the strong muscles of the uterus. There’s also a thick mucus plug that seals the cervix and helps guard against infection. The penis does not come into contact with the foetus during sex. So, basically, you won’t hurt your baby by making love.

Though sex during pregnancy may be different from what you’ve experienced before, in most cases it’s perfectly safe and it can actually be good for you both physically and emotionally. Most women, who are having a normal pregnancy, may continue to have sex right up until their water breaks or until they go into labour.

So, with the science – and any worries – safely out of the way, let’s take a look at just some of the reasons why having sex during pregnancy can be great!

Recreational not procreational

Couples, particularly those, who maybe had to work very hard at becoming pregnant may relish the idea of being able to have sex for the fun of it again! Rampant carnal pleasure is a fabulous emotion, which you can enjoy once again without having to worry about taking either precautions or your temperature! Also, the fact that your body is producing up to 20 per cent more blood during this time, means that every part of your body is super-sensitive, so you’re more inclined to tingle when he touches you or tickles you!

Hitting the G-spot!

The fact that your body is producing more blood is also good news on the orgasm front as orgasms are powered by blood. During pregnancy, you may find that you reach orgasm more quickly or more slowly than usual and many women find that their orgasms increase in intensity. This may be as a result of increased blood flow to the pelvic area, which can make the clitoris and vagina more sensitive and consequently heighten the sensation. You may also have more vaginal discharge or moistness, which could be a plus. When you have an orgasm, your baby is unaware of what you are doing, but it will experience your hormone rush, so orgasms are generally very good for both of you!

A new you!

Let’s face it – there aren’t many men, who don’t find big breasts and Mae West-like curves attractive! That’s why a pregnant woman’s body can provide many men with the ultimate turn-on. During pregnancy, your breasts may feel tingly, tender, and unusually sensitive to touch, especially in the first trimester. The tenderness will usually subside, but your breasts may remain more sensitive. For some, this heightened sensitivity may be a turn-off and you may not want your breasts touched at all. Alternatively, however, both he – and you! – may find that you’re so taken with your new boobs that he can’t keep his hands off them – and you can’t keep your hands off him!

Take your positions!

During pregnancy, you may have to experiment to find the sexual position that’s best for you. During the first three months of pregnancy the foetus takes up very little space in the womb, but, once the stomach starts to grow, sex can feel a little uncomfortable if the man is on top, so it’s best to find other sexual positions. By experimenting, you may also find new positions that you continue to use post-pregnancy. Creativity is the name of the game.

The missionary position (man on top) becomes increasingly difficult as your pregnancy progresses. If you do use this position after the first trimester, wedge a pillow under you so you’re tilted and not lying flat on your back. Also, get your partner to support himself so that his weight is not on your abdomen.

The woman on top position allows you to control the depth of penetration and most of the movement. This position will also permit you to go as fast or as slow as you like, while still controlling the depth of the penis.

Spooning (which gets its name from the way spoons fit together in the drawer) allows the penis to enter you from behind, ensuring that there’s no pressure on the abdomen. Many women find this a very relaxing position for sex during pregnancy.

Hands and knees is also a very good position because of the lack of direct pressure on the abdomen. As your pregnancy continues, you can also rest your belly on the bed.

Apart from the missionary position, all of the above-mentioned positions also allow for manual stimulation of the clitoris either by yourself or your partner.

Oh, blow!

For the most part oral sex during pregnancy is fine. Licking is fine, but your partner shouldn’t blow into your genital area as forcing or blowing air into the vagina could cause an air embolism (a bubble of air that gets into your blood circulation). This is a very rare occurrence, but it could be life-threatening for you or your baby.

Building a closer connection

There’s no doubt that there will be some degree of change in your sex life during pregnancy. Open communication is generally the key to a satisfying and safe sexual relationship during pregnancy, one which will increase your levels of intimacy. The proof of your intimacy with your partner is already there in your tummy, but, if you find that you are losing your desire and motivation for sex – particularly later on in the pregnancy, then you and your partner need to keep the lines of communication open. Experiment as a couple to make sex relaxing and pleasurable for both of you.

Talking to each other about ways of satisfying your need for intimacy, such as kissing or petting, will also ensure that you can strengthen the bond between you and eventually make sex even more passionate and more meaningful than ever!

Enjoy!

If you’re worried…

About hurting the baby

Sex won’t hurt your baby, which is well-cushioned inside your uterus. The uterus is sealed off from the outside world by the mucus plus in the cervix, so your baby is totally safe.

About miscarrying

Sex won’t make you miscarry. As long as your pregnancy is normal and without complications, then sex – and orgasms – are both perfectly safe.

When sex is a no-no

Always speak to your GP or midwife if you have any questions or concerns about sex, particularly if you’re unsure whether you need to abstain, or if you have fears about the baby’s safety. If your healthcare provider anticipates any significant complications with your pregnancy, he or she is likely to advise against sexual intercourse.